A Tale of 3 Dots …

Remember the first time you were taught the logic of using full stops, commas, semi colons, hyphens, exclamation mark etc etc !!!

Such a cumbersome task it seemed to culminate the set of lines with these punctuation marks . Probably for me, that age was too tender to differentiate between which line urged for  a closure and which was to be put on hold. 😀   At least i could never expertise in this domain.

This childhood mess has managed to persist in my life even at present. And so i resorted to adopt the escape route by expressing all those end-of-line emotions by a sole method of    3 DOTS … And tell you what,  this is something i have been doing since long without even being aware of it.

Thanks to someone who has got exemplary observation skills because of whom i realised this peculiar habit of mine.

Now next question arises…. Why ??

Why do i always tend to end the sentences with these 3 DOTS !!!

Well that demanded a hell lot of scrutiny and self analysis to come to a list of possible reasons. Of course the common one was to exert some importance after the phrase so as to attract more than usual attention towards it. But now when i applied my so called “psychological brainstorming skills”, i came out with many more.

1. Strange i know, but full stop seems like the end of things to me, end of thoughts, of creativity, of opportunities etc etc . There is so much to express, to say, to deliver but this full stop brings cessation of my not-so-often active working of mind.
2.  Secondly, no matter how much efforts and words I put up to express myself ,     “kuch na kuch reh hi jata hai” ,  3 dots signifies those unsaid words to me.
3.  And the recent reason i discovered and invented at the same time was … to vocalize thousands of words without actually vocalizing it 😉

Sounds a great idea !! at least to some “muddle head” people like to me who never cease to think but find it really a gruelling task juggling with the umpteen no. of words to find the apt ones 😉

But also , may be absurd to those who either are quite comfortable expressing or find it  futile to express the thoughts bottled up inside.

Well, if you lie in former zone, I am sure your life is worth taking record of. But by chance, you stand in the latter sphere… with no offense, you are not taking life seriously !!

Or being more precise,  you are taking it toooooo seriously.

Someone has said so aptly… 🙂

“Hopes and wishes for all that delights will sour in the midst of action not taken and words unsaid”

Ever thought this way that the almighty has bestowed upon you the profound capabilities to communicate through gestures or conduct or words. Don’t take this blessing for granted by keeping those feelings inside that may bring an immense difference to the life of people who belong to you. Often the fear of “being vulnerable” or “doing it wrong” also brings with it endless potential for more love, forgiveness and connection that really can be miraculous.

What you didn’t say will remain with you forever  throughout the course of your life. Neither it can bring the closure to the matters that need to end nor can begin the story of which you could be the main protagonist but rather chose to put a full stop before it could actually start.

 

So dear readers, listen to the deep existing desires of yours…  to understand and even more than that… to be understood and open up the horizons of the endless words that still stay suspended in the air waiting to be caught  and roll out of your tongue to reach out to someone who deserve to hear them.

Lets not leave any scope of this             ⇓            in your hard earned as well as  “dreamt of ” relationships.

And if some words are too reticent to come out or are left behind in the race , adopt my way … 3 DOTS 😉  seems ambiguous but it really works  provided the receiving side is capable of perceiving those unsaid words. Or for that matter choose any mode of expression because conveying whats lies inside is more important that how it comes out.

Lets make this a life a bit more lively by adding to it innumerable stories that you can frame everyday  with your words, your gestures, and probably something of your own like my 3 Dots and fill your folder of  memories with this lifetime treasure.

Last but the most important !!

… 😉 🙂

Keep decoding !!! 😀

 

 

And no blog can conclude without this gesture…

 

 

for bearing with my “muddle head” thoughts 😉 😀

 

 

Hope to meet you all here soon !! 🙂 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Magic Wand !!!

I am not a writer but for some muddle headed personalities like me, writing comes on its own when our mind has reached a saturation level of retaining things inside . That time the thoughts outpour and fall down on pages in the most haphazard fashion. That’s what i do. No doubt, i have everything inside my head muddled up

I also write to encourage  myself to do the things I really want to do. We always know what is right for us because this concept of “I don’t know what to do” actually do not exist. The solution to every problem lies just before us. The whole point is the pains of taking it up. The words of inspiration we often find ourselves muttering to others, fail to perform the same healing process of our own wounds. We just want to hear from someone else. But that someone else can’t always be there to do the honours. May be you can’t reach out to that person, may be that person is too far from you or may be the person really doesn’t exist. How long will you wait to inject some sense in your brain ? Well, Switch to something better. Just pen it down all that you want to make yourself hear. Trust me it has a profound effect. Because the truth is you are the best teacher of yourself. The words extracted out of your mind will do the wonders to pacify your mind and heart.

And sometimes I write because I just want to write…without bothering about the reviews and ideas of others who out of respect or love or care or by mistake come across my write ups…without rummaging through the umpteen no. of topics on which I should frame out my perfect blog that would soothe out the reading senses of the readers.

Today, I just want to write for myself. Because I had this long nourished habit of writing long stories , I often used to end up in explaining my points in discursive tone. There were days when such stories were whole heartedly invited by people, probably then they had nothing else to do, probably their mind was not brimming with their own never ending thoughts, probably they had enough time in the world to give it to someone else . But now neither do they have time nor interest to invest in others or may be somehow, with passage of time,   i myself forgot to practice this inherent quality of mine.But just recently i realised my power of pestering others still persist

Well, I guess this “Keeda” of “literary loquacity” is not going to leave me any sooner !!!

It will show its impact somewhere . No matter howsoever boring it is, or sounds mundane or pointless or baseless… it satiates my hunger of blurting out all that I keep cooking up in my little muddle head all the time.

Imagine above some 600 letter were typed just to explain my reason to write, the main course has not even begun…

Honestly i can go on writing for hours, its like talking to someone with whom i don’t need to hide anything, who has all the patience in the world to listen to my babbling with no complaints. But then a fact strikes my mind that you may by chance come across this write up  Don’t worry, your time and my secrets are safe

Your most disturbing questions and their most satisfactory answers lie within you, writing is just a weapon to bring out both. It’s certainly not a magic but it’s definitely a wand whose powers you need to discover and its upto you to use it to change the world and most important, to change yourself.

Now before my office kicks me out for spending such a futile day (unfortunately they don’t know i utilised it by writing a “life changing” blog ) or you specially gatecrash my office to urge them to do the same , i myself politely,humbly take your leave promising to come back again  😉

The main course is yet to begin…

Feeling full after a long time   The magic is working !!!

ps: please ignore grammatical mistakes, i did not consult my editor this time :p

Chronicles of Arranged marriage PART 1

 

Have you seen 25 springs of your life ??

Well that’s the biggest crime one would ever dare to commit and what an irony….each one of us is bound to do so. There is no savior!

And just before you realize that you have entered into that vulnerable zone of getting ‘top to bottom looks’ from all kind of aunties giving their expert opinions about your education, salary, weight, complexion, family status and blah blah… a well groomed, superbly sophisticated bio data of yours has already been published online, in newspapers, and handed over to relatives to contribute to this noble cause as much as possible.

And there you get to know that you have fallen into the category of marriageable entity and if the task is not accomplished any sooner, you will be consigned by the society to be “too old” to find any eligible bachelor of your taste and it’s time to bring that ‘compromise’ word in your dictionary.

This generation has been brought up on the diet of bollywood, fairy love tales where one day you bump into someone who ticks all the boxes, followed by a series of twists and turns, dramatic declarations of love, and  you realize his presence swept you off your feet giving an everlasting impression that “yes, he is the one I have been waiting for since ages” , and then after fighting with almost the whole world you both end up  getting married and the story ends on the happy note “and they lived happily ever after”.

With such intrepid thoughts on your mind, it’s difficult to reconcile to the idea of getting hitched to someone barely known, just like that, may be for some 50 years ahead if you are damn unlucky 😉

Surely love stories can’t be that simple and mundane!!!

Alas!! You are not that fortunate to experience such miracles, so it’s going to be simple… a genuine repetition of ‘how my mother met my father’.

So, here begins the adventure ride. You daily get to look at new faces with the most fake kind of smile and flowery background (laughing at the studios that clicks these matrimonial pics in the most funniest ways possible), pore over resumes , measuring every proposal from all angles,

He is shorter in height, Rejected!!

He is earning lesser, Rejected !!

He does not even know cooking, Rejected !!

He doesn’t have much hair, Rejected !!

And the game changer…. Horoscope match …     All turned down!!!  😦 

Seems like those who can manage to attain maximum ticks on the long list of expectations of your family are like endangered species… hard to find, harder to save.

Physics, chemistry, mathematics all seem to be much easier for the first time; at least they didn’t include the question of life and death.

Anyway,  after much brooding …after endless elders discussions… after taking a nod from uncles, aunties, grandpa, grandma, sisters, brothers…  the most beautiful fish is picked out from the sea and honored with the opportunity to meet you.

2 people entirely unknown to each other meet for the first time, picturising the most sociable , pleasant and decent  impression, of course he doesn’t know how extremely scary you look and how extremely weird you behave at times say when you wake up or when you are angry or when you are hungry !!

And certainly you don’t get to know the real him. What if is he is an ex-murderer? Or a possessive jerk?  Or an angry young man? Or a male chauvinist?

Either apply all your judgment skills to guess the answers or just leave it to fate or run the horses of your brain to find out some flimsy excuse to convince your parents. No doubt last option is anytime better than the rest!!!

And the cycle repeats itself again and again and again…….

And before I forget to mention, please accept all my condolences to the boys who in the name of marriage are put up for auction and sold to the highest bidder and what’s more, they are all excited to be offered. You seriously deserve hats off for the pains of taking birth in the family of millionaires, really a herculean task dude….  And my ‘dandvat pranaam ‘  to the boys who burned the midnight oil to gain such  position, status and salary only to be able to bring themselves to the level of those so-called-deserving candidates. What a wasteful utilization of your talent!!!!

Life actually begins where all your wild imaginations and expectations end but it also exists only as long as your dreams and hopes persist.

Yes, this rigmarole of meeting, dating, wondering and agonizing over whether “this was it” again and again seems to be too cumbersome to tackle  but who knows, the prince charming you have been dreaming about since you watched a romantic movie for the first time might actually turn out to be in real.  May be the imaginary bells that ring …the guitars that swing can actually be heard and tell u “yes, he is the one!!  He is the one who wants to grow old with me no matter how ugly I look, he is the one with whom I can share my deepest and silliest secrets, he is the one who will go the extra mile everyday just to see me smile and he is the one with whom I want to spend every second of my life.”

So don’t scoff at these arrangements of arranged marriage, cherish these moments because this is what constitutes the not-so-unique but your very own love story that you will be narrating to your grandchildren one day. Don’t miss the real while waiting for the virtual experiences.

Keep your ears open. The bells can ring anytime!!!

Leave the rest to the Almighty…believe me… he will take care 🙂

Dear Readers!!  Please revert for Chronicles Part-2 because

Ye end nahi hai …Picture to abhi  baaki  hai mere dost   😉

 

Are you an Emotional Flower? :()

Tough question indeed, yet very simple to answer. Just few symptoms to look upon, and if found present, here you enter the danger zone of such phools…

1. Do you often find yourself juggling between the idea of holding on to someone and saving your self-respect?
2. Do you often fail to trust your own perception of a situation because of your old diligently nourished habit of trusting your loved one much more than yourself?
3. Do you not leave a single stone unturned in bottling the things inside your heart, yet at the end of the day, unable to hold any longer, you vent it out realizing that you just banged your head on the wall and then the days are spent guilt stricken for yourself?

Well…It’s simple then. You are an emotional phool, taking along with you unnecessary thorns on the way of a beautiful life.

Then what you usually intend to do??

Excuse yourself from all sorts of emotions, expectations, wishes, and hopes!!!                      In fact all such words that feature in the definition of mohmaya to which you won’t fall prey to anymore!!!!!

No, my dear…You are a social animal, can’t save yourself from this trap for long. Emotions are a part of your character, which shows that you care too much, trust too much and love to bahot jyada much. They simple can‘t be detached. After all, there still exist some differences between god-made-human being and man-created-robot !!

Now, What you have to do !!

1. “If you are happy, and you know it, clap your hands!!

Remember this rhyme you might have sung many times?? Practice now what you learnt then. Show what you feel, let the rays of sunshine wash you with its warmth

2. When Munna bhai couldn’t escape it, how can you??

No matter how hard you try to consider yourself to be built of steel, you just can’t avoid these petty chemical lochchas your mind undergoes every minute. So accept the string of emotions, flow with them, but, just know where to stop before the ocean begins to engulf you.

3. Prevention is better than cure.

It’s important to let the person know what and how much they mean to you or his/her faults that’s troubling you.  You have every right to be angry because keeping it inside won’t help you anyway, instead it would make it turn into resentment, thereby modifying your behavior to the other person and creating a lifelong scratch to the delicately woven string of relationship.

Apologies, reader! For you are not getting rid of me just yet. Let me get started with the “Don’ts” from the endless stock …

1. Slow and Steady Wins the Race

There comes a point where you need to stop. Just wait for the other person to catch you, to realize if he/she really wants to pick up with you, to understand if your efforts are really worth, to analyze if the words heard from him/her truly mean something. The most loyal and honest relation you can ever have in this lifetime is with yourself. Don’t spoil it for saving the one that has already been dumped down in that long list of his/her priorities.

2. Use Your Own Measuring Scale

Don’t try to grant yourself favours by elevating the tiniest efforts of other person and demeaning your large chunks of initiations. What you deserve is not confined to their estimation of your importance.

3. Embrace the expectations

To save ourselves from the pain of disappointments, we often tend to detach from the expectations. We literally fight with our inner demons to keep them at bay, but does it ever happen? Efforts go in vain, my dear…

Expectations are like mirror of the importance one holds for other. No relation can ever survive without them. Even If it does, let me tell you, the base is too weak to hold it upright in unfavorable times. Just one strong blow and things will fall apart.

So hold expectations, because you deserve them, because you have every right to expect and let the other person do the same. But when one’s expectations become a burden to the other, know it’s time to step back. May be what you thought you deserve was quite different from what the other had to give you. May be just a mismatch of priorities. That’s all!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

By now either you are impressed or about to click ‘x’ desperately. Please have patience, the ocean is traversed, just about to reach the shore…

Life is too short, too beautiful, and too precious to debar yourself from experiencing every possible feeling in the world. Be it showers of love, laughter of joys, mischiefs of  friendship, or pangs of pain. Feel everything with all the emotions you possess, for they define you, they make you complete. But don’t let them be a reason for breaking you apart.

Be the flower that spreads fragrance of emotions everywhere but don’t take along with you the thorn that slashes you heart in innumerable pieces.

Ps: A small but inevitable thanksgiving note…

      Thankyou so much Karthik for encouraging me consistently to write “kuch bhi” (guess I exactly did the same :p ) and teaching me enough English so as to be able to write all this stuff. Thanks kunal for approving the draft and seno for your valuable, must-for-me suggestions. Lucky to have you all.

Please come back for more…  I hope the tolerance factor will soon change to Interest with respect to my blogs 🙂

Entering the Blogging world :)

A novice to the world of blogging, and the art of writing ………  trying to  come out with the thoughts my mind had been boggling with solitarily till now. Time to share with you all.

Keep reading and commenting…. 🙂